I WANT it noted that I, and many others, have not been won over by the Olympic Games shenanigans.

To me, it’s just another glorified sports day. I have been trying to forget about those events since I left school.

Every year we would be herded out on to the fields to sit, in the blazing heat or freezing wind, and watch the organised madness.

Kids spent the afternoon racing up and down the athletics track. The cool ones dressed from head to toe in Adidas. The fat ones at the back.

For a few talented runners, it was a chance to show off and up their status in the high school pecking order. However, I was never one of that group.

I hated the hurdles, high jump, long jump, javelin and discus. I quite liked running although I couldn’t sprint and when forced to take part in the 1,500 metres, one of my peers told me I ran like a giraffe.

Sports day seemed more like a punishment than the jolly day of good will and humour the PE department insisted that it was.

Usually, me and my friend Katie survived by trying to remain as inconspicuous as possible and therefore missing as many races as possible.

When the eyes of our PE teachers were turned, we would disappear off round the back of the art rooms.

It’s felt similar this week. While politicians and tourism groups seem to be falling over themselves to applaud the Olympics as something the whole nation can take part in, I can’t help feeling there’s nothing in it for me and around another 80 per cent of the population.

For elite athletes, I’m sure the competition will be amazing. Likewise, for the elite city of London and its businesses I dare say the Olympics will be great –or at least profitable.

But for people, like me, in the North, there’s not much fun to be had except watching hours and hours of ‘other people doing stuff on TV’.

The Olympic torch arrives in South Lakeland next Thursday, and I’ll be reporting on the events. This oversized cigarette being dragged up to Cumbria has done nothing to light my passion for the event.

I’ll try to be enthusiastic. Just don’t expect me to cheer, or run after it, or anything...