Hurting others is a type of behaviour we may see from our children around the time they become toddlers.

Toddlers sometimes hurt others; without thinking they may bite, scratch, pull hair, push or hit. They sometimes present this type of behaviour just to see what happens.

If this gets a reaction from those around them, it can act as an accidental reward. Frustration or anger can also trigger a toddler to react in this way and if it gets results, such as another child giving up a toy, be sure it will happen again.

Some tips on how to prevent your child hurting others:

- Where the hitting and hurting has occurred previously, try to anticipate these high-risk times and be prepared to act quickly.

- Encourage desirable behaviour; when they are playing well, give them lots of attention and praise them for what they are doing. For example, “I love the way you are being gentle with your friend/the cat/your toys."

- Help them to say what they want. Frustration with toddlers can often lead to hitting out.

If your child hurts others, move within arm's length, get down to your child’s level and use their name. Tell them what they should stop doing. For example, “Tom, stop hurting Daniel; ask him nicely for the toy.”

Show your child how to be gentle, such as stroking the dog instead of pulling its tail. Encourage your child to practise this, taking their hand as you do so, and praise them for doing the right thing.

Remember this is usually a phase that will, with your guidance, be short-lived.

See www.parentandbabycoach.co.uk