HOW TO GROW YOUR OWN FOOD WITH DIRTY NAILS MARCH, 4TH WEEK SPRING CLEANING With the time of year being where it is, Dirty Nails has been having a jolly good spring clean both around the garden and in his shed. Pots and buckets have accumulated by the water butt, lengths of stick require sorting, bundles of this-and-that need to find a place out of the way but still handy. Paths want sweeping, undug beds must be mulched and turned over.

The shed has been worked hard over the winter, both as a veg store and workshop. Dirty Nails has been creating surface space, clearing the floor, and putting away odds-and-ends. He likes to keep himself uncluttered as April beckons because there is much to do and he needs to be organised in order to fit it all in.

Back on the plot, he is always mindful not to be over-tidy. He considers anywhere that could potentially be populated by wildlife as an important part of the veg garden ecosystem. Growing food crops can be very controlling of the land. His planting plans include leaving space for both wild plants and creatures to express themselves within and around the cultivated area. By striking a good balance, Dirty Nails manages to harvest plenty of edibles whilst working with and amongst the nature he loves. He is a big advocate for brambles (tops for blackberries!) and stinging nettles (delicious steamed like spinach, with tender tips available for picking now). The enchantment value of working a piece of land complete with wild corners and pockets is often underestimated, too. Dirty Nails is a firm believer in changing things for the better, and not just for the sake of it.

SECOND EARLY SPUDS Whilst thrilling to the opera of surrounding birdsong, and gazing with child-like wonder at the twinkling, shimmering surfaces of his ponds, alive with thousands of wriggling tadpoles, Dirty Nails has been planting his Second Early spuds this week. Popped in to a depth of 6 inches (15 cm), he plants at 15 inch (38 cm) intervals in rows 2 feet (60 cm) apart. His Second Early spud of choice is Kestrel. It is a handsome potato, sporting purplish patches on oval tubers. They will bake, mash, or boil straight from the ground in July, August, or September and will store easily until at least New Year if well looked after.

EXTRACTS FROM DIRTY NAILS’ JOURNAL ALLOTMENT DISPUTE “There are as many different ways to garden as there are gardeners. An allotment field or site must accommodate these myriad methods and values. Down St. James over Easter weekend we had a clash of cultures. All sides were left feeling wronged and got-at, misunderstood and very angry.

“We have a good community down here. No association or hierarchy, just a collection of bods who tend their plots in different ways and for various reasons. Food is obvious but other things are available to allotmenteers be they fresh air, escape, exercise, peace and solace, or whatever. Some of us work like our bellies depend on it although thankfully in this time and place they don’t. Others like to take a more leisurely and relaxed stroll through the seasons.

“The Town Council administers the paperwork, and we muddle through happily enough. The plots are at various stages of cultivation, only a couple neglected, and the edges dance with an assortment of hedgerow vegetation as the year passes by. We are not an especially fussy collection of gardeners in my observation. The brambly, nettley patches muck along cheek-by-jowl with fine tilth and neat borders.

“Anyway, this dispute occurred on Good Friday. One of the fondly known ’Chemical Brothers’ came on site with heavy machinery and a mate. They not only prepared one of their enormous plots with the turn of a key, shift of gears and control of wheel, but also laid waste to a corner of the communal bramble patch. They did so because they don’t want it, but it is not theirs to tamper with. That was my line anyway, when I went down to calm frayed tempers.

“Some people like the edges clean and tidy, the paths mown neat and short. The whole site “is a bloody disgrace” (and this includes all the working plots, I was told). Apparently such an unkempt allotment field has never before been seen. Somehow I doubt it. But their attitude suggested a mentality that differs from that of most who potter the hours away down here. Their wish to employ available machinery to grub and plough, to drain, ditch and irrigate revealed a glimpse of that particular rural attitude that loves to divide the town and country into ‘them‘ and ‘us‘. That the bogginess of the briar patch renders it unworkable without serious readjustment means nothing to those for whom a morning bulldozing and earth-moving is all part of a good day’s work. That we, and that includes all of us who bend our backs in peaceful productive meditation, have stated that we want this area kept as a wildlife haven gets interpreted as wishy-washy preservation from townies who don’t understand ’country ways’. “And there we left it; mechanical versus manual, chemical versus organic, country versus town. In the politest possible manner (for we are all ultimately just tenant farmers) I suggested that maybe land elsewhere could be rented if the disapproval of our allotments was for real, and not to pass judgement on the honest toil and labours of others. Somewhat pacified, but rather indignantly, the lads got in their van and headed home for lunch."

How to Grow Your Own Food by Dirty Nails (ISBN 9781905862115) is available from www.dirtynails.co.uk and bookshops, rrp £10.99.

Copyright, Dirty Nails March 2009