LAKE District residents were among the first to be hit by this week's petrol crisis, but as my picture shows community spirit came to the fore as they helped stranded tourists to the top of Kirkstone Pass, telling them they could roll down into Patterdale where there was a fully-stocked filing station at the bottom, thus craftily getting rid of the visitors and conserving supplies in Ambleside for local use.

(Contributed picture)

OLYMPIC time is here again offering a chance to marvel yet again at how a country can afford to spend billions of pounds on building virtually a small city to house them and on the often incomprehensible, but lavish, opening and closing ceremonies.

For many years I have held the view that the Olympics should be returned to their roots, basic running, jumping and chucking things about, anything requiring a judge's decision should be scrapped.

Out would go gymnastics, synchronised swimming, judo, wrestling, boxing, and all the others which, to a large degree, rely on the verdict of someone who is a judge often because they could not do the sport to top level themselves.

Also out would be the equipment sports such as cycling, sailing and horse-leaping, as it always seems unfair to me that Olympic gold should rest on the number of sprockets on a cog wheel, the ability to put the best polish on a hull, or what a horse (usually called Helvellyn Single-Glazing, or some similar bit of blatant advertising) had for breakfast.

Having reduced the games to essentials and given that 99.5 per cent of people watch them on television rather than pay inflated prices to travel halfway round the world and see a fraction of them, I believe Cumbria would be in a good position to bid for a future staging and put on a show which was both entertaining and honest.

Hurdling for instance would involve competitors sprinting across a few fields and taking our stone walls in their stride.

No chance of craftily knocking over a few with the leading foot to save a few hundredths of a second - just a bit of rolling around clutching yourself in agony if the jump is not quite high enough.

Long jump would take on a whole new dimension in a Cumbria Olympics.

Competition would start near the top of the Kentmere valley, where the River Kent is but a trickle.

Everyone would cleared it would then move downstream a bit for the next round, giving the cameras a chance of a new view rather than the same old sandpit.

As the river widened there would be no need for a judge peering at a plastacine strip to see whether it was a legal jump - anyone with a wet trainer would be out.

It would also be clear that by the time the competition reached Gooseholme anyone still in was on drugs.

The Stricklandgate Dash would become the premier sprint event of the games.

Competitors would line up at the Pelican crossing at Allhallows Lane then sprint across the instant the little man goes red (as most pedestrians in Kendal do already).

After a number of heats the last one to be knocked down would win the gold.

Throwing sports would include the spectacle of the North of England Yorkie Chucking Championship.

Women competitors to throw the ones with pink bows and men the ones with blue bows.

No need for a judge here either as competitors would all throw from the top deck of a Windermere steamer at the same time and would therefore not be able to get ahead of the throwing line, while the rings in the water would show who had won.